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While birds of similar karmic feathers flock together,
these birds can choose to fly in different directions too.

Stonepeace

There is a belief that friends or even lovers who look somewhat similar have higher tendencies of staying together for good. That’s the idea of ‘looking compatible’ literally. In Chinese culture, it’s called the ‘spousal look’ (fuqixiang). It’s the opposite of the idea that complementary ‘opposites attract’ though. A reason why the two ‘halves’ of a couple look alike is that they had created similar karma in the past, be it in this life and/or previous ones, together or not, such that they karmically look alike as a result. As they could already be lovers, or good friends in past lives, their ability to encounter each other in this life could well be a continuation of their past karmic affinity. (Likewise for pet-owners and their pets who resemble each other!)

That said, it’s not true that those who don’t look similar will definitely be incompatible, since new karmic affinities that strengthen in time have to start somewhere. This is why some loving elderly couples, upon hindsight, transform over the years to look increasingly alike! Those who currently look alike, however, could be on the course of becoming increasingly dissimilar, first in character and thus gradually in appearance, as how we look and change in looks is a karmic expression of our shifting characters too. This doesn’t mean it is accurate to judge by appearances though, for as above, due to constant flux in character, appearances do change, and not always immediately to reflect present character!

Though prone to pressure due to looking ‘less compatible’, couples with less fuqixiang don’t necessarily fare worse. In fact, due to karmic similarities, those with fuqixiang tend to have similar perceptions of issues. This can spell both greater harmony and disharmony – as dependent on the duo’s mix of virtues and faults! Those with outlooks that are ‘too similar’ might find their relationships less spiritually stimulating. Imagine marrying a mirror image! Due to fluxing conditions and choices, it is impossible for two to be exactly alike though. The only way to be 100% alike in appearance and character is by perfecting Compassion (and thus merits) and Wisdom – to become equally magnificent Buddhas!

Two might be reborn as conjoined twins
due to strong physical attachment
and strong similarities in karma.

Stonepeace

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One Response to “‘Looks’ Like It’s A Perfect Match?”

  1. Yes, we are supposed to be the same (not just between husband & wife or conjoined twins)…before we were affected by the 3 poisons of greed, desire and delusion…and became busy spending our time and energy trying to handle different people that we meet…without realising that these people are no different from us…we are all in a dream and delusion. When will the day come when we can finally be awaken and realise that we can love a stranger the same way as we love our spouse or parents…through compassion?

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